3/14/11

If this is Austin, I still love you*

Isn't it funny how the place you want to escape from the most is the place you end up missing the most? It's the place you run away from, but always end up returning.

As I landed in Flint yesterday, I couldn't wipe the smile off of my face. Dreary, depressing, blanketed in white, cold Flint. Where the only good things here are my family and a handful of friends. I love it for what it is and what it was.


Swartz Creek is a great place to grow up. Small Town outside of a once prosperous city (that you can't go into after 10:00 pm for fear of being shot, but still), it's like many American towns. After two hours, though, I sent this text message: "Wish it was time to come home."


Home.


To Austin, Texas.
Home.

Where there's an almost 13 year old girl who looks up to me, a 16 year old I torture like my little brother, a guy who treats me like I'm the best thing since sliced bread, an Aunt that is teaching me everything I need to learn, things to do no matter what night it is, where you can be country in the city, where my car is currently needing an alternator on the side of the curb.


Home.
I can't imagine living anywhere other than Austin, now.


I'm never negative, and it just seemed (as a good friend of mine pointed out) that as soon as I was 'home', I was negative. My parent's house will always be home, but it's not my home.


I can't wait to go to East Lansing, take a picture with Sparty, see my friends, but that's not home either. I feel like a visitor, and I keep thinking, 'what are the perks to being here?' Coney dogs, Faygo, friends, seeing my dad.

I wrote that two months ago.  Back when I was in Michigan, back when I thought life couldn't get better. 

Well, newsflash, it has. 

I still miss my family like crazy, my car was fixed within the week, and then the guy who treated me better than sliced bread now has a title.  It's not gigantic asshole or even dipshit, but it's my Boyrfriend. I've realized that home is not just here in Austin, but wherever I'm with someone who cares about me.  I've realized I don't have to go to Swartz Creek.  I'm not yearning to see the high school, swing at Elms road park, or even go sledding.  No, I'm missing the people.  My family and my friends.  I'm not missing football or baseball games, even though I am a bit depressed I won't see a Tigers game for my birthday this year. I'm happier than I was at this time last year, the year before that, and even the year before that.  

So, Austin, I'm in love with you.
Always have been, and I always will be.